Today I officially became a working girl!! Or a volunteering girl. I have come to the end of my constant lunching and brunching. This however is amazing. I am volunteering at the Plimmerton School library helping out the lovely librarian Fiona with anything and everything.
It feels amazing to be useful again. It also makes the time when you are not working feel more like downtime making it more special. I also went for my first trip to the Porirua pool today. I managed to swim a measly six lengths before retiring to the spa but as the weather was so grot outside the spa was actually rather lovely!
I have been keeping myself busy and I am sure annoying my friends to the brink of insanity. It was interesting because one night I was at a mates flat and some guy who I hardly know said to me "Why do you always talk about cancer? It's over and it's kinda depressing that you always talk about it."
These weren't his actual words but just the general gist of what he was asking me. It got me thinking, do I talk about cancer too much? Am I obsessed? Is it really over??? I asked two of my friends if they thought I talked about it to much. One said yes, one said no.
I don't think I am obsessed and I think maybe it is over for everyone else but not for me. I also realized that this is what I have done for the past year. It's such a big part of my life. Everything in my life for the past year has centered around it but what to do?
I don't want people to feel uncomfortable around me by talking about cancer all the time but I still want people to feel comfortable to ask questions if they want. I think maybe it's just time will mean it will be less of a presence in my life and more things will take center stage.
Becoming a working girl is just another step to becoming normal again.