Saturday, 16 November 2013

The Problem With Exponential Growth

The problem with cancer is the tumours and these problems like tears in the lungs don't tend to go away. They tend to get worse. I cannot believe quite how sick I have got in such a short space in time.   I have officially had to move out of Boulcott and am definitely regressing back towards baby state.

I have this awful cough which makes me feel like my lungs want to be on the outside of my body rather than on the inside where they are supposed to be. I also can't eat very much anymore which also depletes the amount of energy I generally have to. The painkillers make my mind a little more foggy.  So yeah, I spend most of my days in bed!! I have found this magical thing called Lonely (The lonely hearts bra range) and they do these amazing bras that don't have underwire so I can sleep in the m and they are comfortable!! So I am far more happy about this than I should be!!! I don't have to get dressed every time I hop into bed. You know you are getting sick when this is an achievement. 

Then you have days like yesterday when I had a migraine and unlike a migraine taking one day to sort of fix itself up, I still am feeling it a little bit which such but it must go away because tonight I am going to One Republic concert with my friend Danielle. 

When I used to say rest I meant that I would not do much walking but now I mean rest, I have not left the couch or except to pee or shower. I am napping/in full on cat mode getting ready for tonight.

But I'm lucky there has been loads of good things that have been happening in my life, not just the fact that my friends from out of town have come back or my friend Gilly has the most gorgeous puppy Kelly!! Or the fact that my parents have agreed that I get to dog sit a dog during the day!!!

But my friend, who i guess isn't my friend anymore decided to ask me out!!! This is super and ultra exciting because I may have had a crush on him for quite a long time and he's one of my best mates so it's like do I say anything... Luckily I didn't coz he felt the same way!!! :) Oh right, his name is Mac and he went to Wellington College and then did a GAP year with Bex and everyone so he lives in wellington too! Soo that's all very exciting!! Secretly, I really like this one, he's pretty awesome! Though awkwardly we don't have any pictures together! I will have to get some!
My friend Katie also couldn't go to Taylor Swift so she gave me two tickets so guess who is getting a super exciting date weekend up to Auckland on the 29th... I know you do have my permission to feel sorry for him now but I promise I'm not mean to him all the time, just a lot of it! 

So my health isn't great, I don't know how much longer I have but I still have many thing which make me happy! ONE REPUBLIC TONIGHT! Aren't I lucky?

Anthony and I at Brokeback Mountain
Cuddles With Kelly 


  1. Hi Harriet. I remember looking after you when you were a little girl. You were very resilient back then and it looks like you still are. Your strength humbles me. I thought you might like the following quote which is part of a letter written by Friedrich Nietzsche to his friend Franz Overbeck in 1881.

    My dear friend, what is this our life? A boat that swims in the sea, and all one knows for certain about it is that one day it will capsize. Here we are, two good old boats that have been faithful neighbors, and above all your hand has done its best to keep me from "capsizing"! Let us then continue our voyage—each for the other's sake, for a long time yet, a long time! We should miss each other so much! Tolerably calm seas and good winds and above all sun—what I wish for myself, I wish for you, too, and am sorry that my gratitude can find expression only in such a wish and has no influence at all on wind or weather!
    — November 14, 1881: Letter from Friedrich Nietzsche to Franz Overbeck.

  2. Hi Harriet, I am a friend of an acquaintance.
    I hope that you know that this life is not all there is. There most definitely is God, I have been a Christian for at least 35 of my 60+ years, and He has answered so many prayers miraculously, that I can't deny his existence.
    He wants us all to be with Him in a very happy heaven, and so has made it as easy as possible. We just have to ask Him! All he wants is for us to speak to Him, since He just loves us.
    And what of sickness? Of course God knew, but Adam and Eve didn't, all the connotations of the words -If you turn from me and do things your own way, you will die! Whether those two people existed or not is not important, the lesson is valid. If we don't live in complete communion with our Creator we die! And indeed, none of us is perfect, so we do all die at one time or another.
    However, Jesus came to take all our imperfections on Himself, and to take our punishment of death by dying for us. He could do this because He himself did not have to die, he'd stayed in communion with God, so he could choose to die for humanity.
    Its a bit complicated, Harriet, - all I do know is that if you - if anyone - wants to go to Heaven we just have to ask Jesus - as did the prisoner on the other cross.
    You may wonder - why then doesn't everyone ask? I haven't a clue! It just is so easy!
    These are the verses for you.
    Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live." John 11:25: and
    “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for them that love Him." 1 Corinthians 2 verse 9