I actually chucked my guts up from it which has never happened before. It's rather impressive when you consider that in hospital I have a pump which injects 2 different anti-nausea drugs into my arm, I also take an aprepitant, multiple steroids and about 5 form of oral tablets to try to keep the nausea at bay and it has worked until this time.
I also have been given a sort of rough end date. If everything goes to plan I should be done with all of this by early August. However apart from feeling glum because I have been feeling so sick and missing my brother and dad (they have been skiing in the US of A for 10 days) I have been feeling kinda irritated.
It took me a while to work out why I have been so but I figured it was down to the fact that I just want to be over now. I have really had enough of feeling sick and not having enough energy to walk anywhere or do anything. I just wanted it to be done now. In short, I think I hit a five month wall. I have done five months but I still have another seven to go.
This quote that I was shown was:
"Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass...
It's about learning how to dance in the rain"
This is so true and it actually made me think about my irateness and I have now finally come to the conclusion that it is stupid to waste my time being irritated. I can't change the fact that there is still another seven months. Moaning and groaning about how long I have left will just put me in a bad mood.
I am in the middle of the biggest hurricane of my life, it's trying battering me every which way. I can hardly walk but I am doing everything I can with a smile because who cares. In the end the storm will pass, so for now I am just going to do my utmost best to be the most obnoxious dancer in the rain.