It makes me so sad to think about like I know more than most that dying sucks. There is nothing I can do to change the fact I am dying. Absolutely nothing. Yet there are so many people out there dying from things which are curable and that sucks.
I have had so much love in my life, so much happiness. I have been unbelievably lucky I have been in the time that I have lived yet I hate the fact that I will never grow old. I accept that this is the way it has to be but I desperately wish it wasn't.
I had really big dreams. I really wanted to become a humanitarian aid worker and trust me when I say this is not an easy field to get into. I had a 5 year plan which listed ways in which I could achieve these goals. I won't bore you with the details because the fact is it will never be a reality. It will forever just be a dream of what my future could have been like. I know that writing a blog entry isn't really a big deal but in some small way even though this is sort of preachy (sorry!) by doing this I feel like I am able to help people and that is all I ever wanted to do.