I am one of four people in every million that are diagnosed with Osteosarcoma. Whenever the doctors come to see me they bring millions of them! I almost feel like I am some sort of exciting new toy, and i guess when you consider how rare this is, I am the doctors own personal sparkly toy.
Yesterday I had the biopsy, it was rather a strange experience, their was this man across the room waiting in the pre-op bay. He had nasty scabs all up and down his arms and was somebody who you would cross the road to avoid. I was then wheeled into the theatre, being wheeled is a strange feeling in itself. You are being pushed on your back while you are still but the world is moving around you. Its such an odd sensation. The nurse then gave me an injection and told me to breathe in and out of one of those masks and count...1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9....10.........
When i woke up, I was back in my room yet i was so not there! It felt like I was like I was sitting above my bed watching the conversations that surrounded me. I felt like I was becoming old. I could not stay awake, half way through a conversation my head would droop...... and...... and.......
I woke up early in the morning needing to pee, I had three nurses at 1:30 in the morning helping me get to the bathroom as i had to keep my leg straight as it hurt too much to bend. I had to have my nana toilet seat roll me into the bathroom where my nausea successfully made me throw up what little was left of my stomach contents. After more pain relief and anti-nausea, i went back to play with the faires...
I woke up later this morning feeling much better, the drugs had worn off and I was actually able to stomach some breakfast. Lunch was a different matter, it really looked like sick on a plate so father was kind and got me some sushi! :)
I found out my plan for the next two years of my life. I am going to have to get chemotherapy for the next 12 weeks then I shall have the tumor removed and part of my knee will need to be replaced, then I will have chemotherapy for another 6-12months.
I am coming back to Wellington tomorrow, this makes me sooo happy, it's lonely here. The flowers my friend Hannah sent me and the cards from my friends and family make it bearable, when they said I might stay here for the chemo, i almost broke down. I have accepted that I have cancer and that I need to fight it, but the idea of leaving my friends would be almost too hard as they are such a big part of my life and bring me sooo much happiness and always will.
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Harriet; words cannot begin to express how sorry I am for you to have to go through something like this! You are an amazing person (please, I know I sound cliched, but words for this do not come easily), and I ... sorry, I just don't know what to say.
ReplyDeleteKia kaha hon! You are so strong, and you have the support of everyone, especially the big QMC fam bam!
your strength and courage is so inspiring hat, you are such an amazing girl and you have all the support of us hobbits behind you, love you!
ReplyDeletep.s you are fluffy xxx